Dating 101

Dating 101

I used to think I was the only person in the world who disliked the dating process but recently I’ve been meeting people who share my exact feelings towards this very awkward phase of life. The whole thing just stresses me out. Getting to know someone new or old, asking questions and sharing your life knowing that everything you say will and can be used against you, it’s extremely uncomfortable. Well I’m officially sick of it…kinda. Not because I’m a serial dater or anything but because the whole idea of getting to know someone and not knowing if they have the right intentions is just draining.

So, what makes it draining you might ask… well my issue is the lack of sincerity and the pretense. I wish people would just be 100% vulnerable and honest all the time. Like let’s imagine what dating and relationships would look like if we didn’t care to sell ourselves to a potential boo but instead were just 100% honest. What’s the point of providing a false impression of yourself while trying to get to know someone else? How exactly does that help either of you?

Also, what’s your reason for even dating in the first place? The lack of being intentional just seriously blows my mind. I do not understand why people waste their time wasting time. If you’re not interested… keep it moving. If you don’t know what you want… keep it moving. Don’t go searching for a job you’re not ready to have.

The thing is, I think dating should be more like an interview and less like elections. Imagine yourself as a fortune 500 company looking to hire a CEO. You want someone who is qualified for the job but also open to learning about and effectively running your company. On the other hand, like the elections, we act like politicians who say the right things and make empty promises trying to convince everyone else that we’re the “right choice.”  We should be looking for the best person to achieve our goals with not convincing somebody that we’re worth their time.

Trying to sell yourself to another person should never be the goal in dating. Dating just to date and hanging out should not be the goal in dating. Dating should lead to marriage and why you marry is more important than who you marry. There should be a purpose for your marriage and I believe dating should be the process we use to find who will help us achieve our why.

Find your why and God will help you find the Who!

Lots of love!

-MzB

ALL things!

ALL things!

It’s only been 10 days of this year and already I have learned so much. God is constantly taking all the minute details in my life and making them work for my good. Sometimes we go through what we call irrelevant  or  even annoying experiences but let us be reminded that ALL things work together for our good.

Looking back on last year, there were many things I went through that I thought were merely irrelevant in the grand scheme of things. Some were annoying or difficult at the time, but in these first ten days of 2018, God has shown me that ALL things work together for my good.

Today while talking to my soul sister aka my bestie of life, Oynks, we both laughed about how awesome God is and how His ways are not our ways.  God continually shows us that we don’t have to see or understand what He is doing to know He is at work in our lives. Oynks is going through a situation that would ordinarily discourage or confuse anyone, but instead of being disappointment, she chooses to believe that ALL things, good or bad, work together for her good. Our conversation just encouraged me that no matter what I’m going through, whether it makes sense or not, good or bad, or even terrible, some way somehow, God will make it all work together for my good.

For the past 5 years, I’ve been planning wedding and events. Planning has always been my passion from as far back as I can remember and using my passion to celebrate with another person is a very rewarding feeling for me. This past year, I decided to launch my own wedding and event planning company, The Willow, after working with other companies.

In the beginning stages, frustration was my best friend. I was overwhelmed, afraid, nervous and all sort of mixed emotions. After reaching out to many people, I realized that I didn’t have faith in what I was doing. I didn’t trust that God who gave me this passion and desire would make the necessary arrangements to help me prosper. I was counting on my own ideas, strengths and knowledge instead of having faith that God would back me up. And just like that…. my source, my help, turned it all around. Not only has He been exceeding my expectations, He has reminded me that all my efforts, and all the little things I was doing to build my business were not in vein. All the “irrelevant, not important” things I did the past few years, God has caused them to matter now.

I say all this to say, that no matter what it looks like now, good or bad, small or big, important or irrelevant, ALL things will work together for your good. Not only will they work together for your good, but God will show you how they work together for your good. The tiniest details of your life are for a reason. Lessons learned are very important. Do not be defeated, do not give up, because you can’t see it doesn’t mean God isn’t working.

Happy New Year & I wish you an abundance of beautiful new beginnings this year!

-MzB

Intentional – Travis Greene

This song gets me every time!

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